I am in awe (some might say obsessed) with the sky, its beauty, the way the colors shift on the horizon, and the way it’s always changing!

The phrase “On the Horizon” symbolizes a change drawing near, often moving toward the unknown. As we head into the uncharted territory of our lives, we can be overwhelmed, frightened, and unsure of how to proceed. But the horizon also symbolizes limitless potential, new beginnings, and the imagination of what’s beyond human sight. Facing what is on the horizon might seem unbearable at times, but it illustrates impermanence. Even when all we see is darkness, light exists somewhere on the other side. The sky is always changing; the sun will always set and a new day will begin. Knowing that life is beautiful, painful, joyful, and ever so fragile allows us to face what is ahead, move through adversity, seek purpose, and find meaning in the entire human experience.

An End-of-Life Doula is a non-medical companion who walks along side an individual or family providing holistic care - emotional, physical, and spiritual - at end of life. Just as a birth doula helps welcome a baby into the world, a death doula helps a person transition as gently and lovingly as possible out of this life.

A doula collaborates with your hospice team to provide additional support with non-medical tasks to ensure that your physical, emotional, and spiritual needs are being addressed.

My main purpose is to listen to what you need to make your life meaningful and to help you leave the legacy you want.

Depending on your priorities, I provide the information, guidance, and support you desire. This might be giving emotional support to you and other family members, facilitating challenging conversations with loved ones, coordinating a family gathering, planning and sitting vigil during active dying, or helping create a legacy project for your family.

I give respite to caregivers, so family can do some necessary self care. I provide emotional support and assistance if desired with care planning, celebrations, and rituals.

If children are involved, I can engage them in discussions, play, and creative activities to assist with their understanding of the dying process and to help them express their emotions.

I have personally experienced the fear and overwhelm of terminal illness. Being a caregiver and mother supporting both my husband and children through death and loss allows me to hold you in a space of genuine empathy and understanding. My experience as a social worker and grief counselor will allow me to support you individually and your entire circle of family at each phase to reduce stress and help you make the most of the time remaining.

• You reach out to me via phone, email, or the contact form.

• We’ll set up a free 30 minute consultation for you to share your situation, ask me questions, and see if you feel I am a good fit to support you and your family.

• We’ll proceed with an intake meeting to discuss what type of services you would like and create a contract together that supports you and your loved ones.

You can reach me anytime via my contact page or by phone or email. I will do my best to get back to you as soon as possible.

612-910-0795

jsong2502@gmail.com

“Jen meets kids where they’re at, sees them for who they are, gives them a voice, and maintains a steady, playful, loving and healing presence, even during the most difficult transitions and losses. Jen’s endless creativity enables children to find their own unique path forward.”

- Rose, LPCC and colleague

Yes, grief during terminal illness or an impending death is called anticipatory grief and is very normal. Experiencing illness or watching someone you love change and grow closer to end of life is very difficult. Feelings of sadness, anxiety, and emotional distress are frequently part of this journey.

It is okay to also feel shut down or emotionally numb when faced with grief. Managing logistics, a sense of overwhelm, and our protective nervous systems might be several of the reasons why. There is no right way to grieve. Be patient and loving with yourself, and be with people who make you feel safe and supported.

To be honest, it doesn’t. But it won’t always feel intolerable. I think of grief as the new relationship with the person you love. It will always be there because you will always love them - the memories, the stories, the longing - but their presence becomes a part of you in a new and different way.

I mostly listen. I want to hear your stories, your memories, your joys, your regrets. I will offer emotional support and guidance as you navigate role changes, adjustments, and parts of life that change when someone you love dies.

Together we might just talk if that is what you need. But we might also write, create art, seek new social opportunities, or find ways to integrate the memory of your loved one into your life in new and meaningful ways.

Be patient because grief doesn’t have a timeline.

Listen and allow them to express a wide range of emotions.

Let them talk about their loved one. Say their loved one’s name.

Say, “I am here for you.” Avoid platitudes, such as “He is in a better place.”

Bring something over, mow the grass, or shovel the walk for them instead of saying, “Let me know if you need anything.”

Keep checking in weeks, months, and even years after the death. They are still missing them, and it means a great deal when you don’t forget that.